parenting update
Aug. 30th, 2005 12:35 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
percivalThis is a fly-by update - our miracle girl has become far more active and demanding, and it's difficult to get computer time.
She is now three weeks old, and a precious little darling. She's getting more and more alert. She doesn't respond to toys very well yet, but she's hugely interested in her surroundings - furniture, ceilings, mum-person, dad-person, black cardigans, you name it, she studies it with rapt attention. When she's bored or uncomfortable, she cries, which is a huge change from the early weeks, where cries meant a nappy or food. Now, when she needs a nappy change, she doesn't cry unless it's really serious and she's soaked, so we've taken to watching her cues to determine when it's time for a change.
Baby also likes to be close to us. She prefers to be upright or inclined upwards, held, and within sniffling distance of a person. She does not like to be in the car seat anymore, unless she is so sound asleep that she doesn't notice being put in the seat, something interesting is within sight or a person is rocking her in the car seat.
For the first three weeks of her life, my husband had taken time off work, and that was invaluable. He took over the housework while I looked after Ruth and looked after her when I had to shower or wanted some rest. Having my parents over for the first week was invaluable. My mother cooked, cleaned, and washed, while my father helped get the garden into shape. I still have some help - a postnatal doula is coming in two days a week for three hours at a time, and she cooks, helps with laundry, advises on breastfeeding and baby care issues, and this week will also help with cleaning the flat.
I'm recovering very well. We ventured out for our first short walk when Ruth was 1.5 weeks, and made our first trip to Starbucks when she was nearly two weeks. When venturing out, I need to wait until she's fed and settled, but once out, we're fine. Which brings me to the two things that have made a huge difference to me, babywearing and breastfeeding.
Yes, I'm pleased to report that breastfeeding is well established. I've been lucky in that baby is a good feeder, I had great support in hospital during the evening and night of her third day outside the womb, and I have enough milk to feed her. Even though only I feed her at the moment, the actual feeds are very little hassle. I just whip out the good stuff and off we go - unless she decides to fuss, study the wall behind me, go look for my nipple below my breast, pummel my breasts into shape with her hands, suck her hand/thumb, or wave her hands in front of her mouth while she extends her head, leaving my nipple exposed to the air. Patience and a firm hand on the back of her head can usually persuade her to see the light, though. No sterilising, no bottles, no bottle racks, no bottle warmers. When we're out and about, a small backpack with wipes, nappy sacks, nappies, and a spare outfit is more than enough for her needs. The only downside (?) is that I need to (and do) eat like a horse.
Babywearing means that quite a lot of the time, I carry baby around with me in a ring sling , sometimes also in a wrap carrier. The ring sling is great for nursing: you shift baby down and/or to your side, get the food on the table, and off you go. If you're nursing in public, you can drape a discreet sling over both of you. The sling not only helps a fussy sleepy baby transition from howling to sleep - it's also invaluable if you walk or use public transport a lot, like me, who can't even drive. On busses, you only take up one seat, you can navigate every shop without problems, and around the house, baby's safe and sound asleep while mum does some light housework like sweeping the floor, or folding laundry. A real life saver.
Right now, I'm using the ring sling a lot more than the Didymos, because putting it on is very quick and easy, and nursing in it is really easy, too, while I prefer to leave the big wrap carrier for longer trips, because it distributes baby's weight more evenly across my back. Slings have some disadvantages, too, though. You can't cook in them (too dangerous for baby), you need to ensure that airflow is not obstructed, you need to make sure that baby can't fall out (especially with the ring sling) and that her head is well-supported.
In fact, that sling has been so crucial to me that I was floored when a midwife suggested I shouldn't use it, because a baby had suffocated in a sling, which left me in tatters. I researched this issue like a woman possessed, and found out that
a) the midwife didn't know very much about slings, so the recommendations she gave me were sort of useless; she didn't really seem to know the details of the case, such as the make and model of that sling, anyway
b) I did need to adjust the way I used my ring sling for a newborn, which I have duly done
c) the only case of a baby suffocating in a baby carrier that I came across was in a Tomy carrier, a vertical carrier very different from a ring sling, and that was because mum had wrapped her child up way too snugly and tightly
My health visitor, who advises new mums on baby care, hadn't heard of any such warnings, either, and the midwives and doctors in hospital, where I twice wore baby in the sling, never batted an eyelid. (I don't have a pediatrician I could ask - in the UK, babies and children are cared for by General Practitioners).
So, the conclusion is: do your own research. That I was prepared for, but what floored me was how vulnerable to this not-quite-correct advice I was, especially because it was given in a bad manner. Probably to do with the hormones of a woman two weeks post partum ...
Finally, thank you SO MUCH to![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
pinkfluffyllama, actionreplay and jessanndi for the lovely cards, hildigunnur for the card and sweet gift, and piperx for the fantastic card & pressies. I think that the toy will come into its own shortly :). pinkfluffyllama, we're already using your box for storing cotton wool!
She is now three weeks old, and a precious little darling. She's getting more and more alert. She doesn't respond to toys very well yet, but she's hugely interested in her surroundings - furniture, ceilings, mum-person, dad-person, black cardigans, you name it, she studies it with rapt attention. When she's bored or uncomfortable, she cries, which is a huge change from the early weeks, where cries meant a nappy or food. Now, when she needs a nappy change, she doesn't cry unless it's really serious and she's soaked, so we've taken to watching her cues to determine when it's time for a change.
Baby also likes to be close to us. She prefers to be upright or inclined upwards, held, and within sniffling distance of a person. She does not like to be in the car seat anymore, unless she is so sound asleep that she doesn't notice being put in the seat, something interesting is within sight or a person is rocking her in the car seat.
For the first three weeks of her life, my husband had taken time off work, and that was invaluable. He took over the housework while I looked after Ruth and looked after her when I had to shower or wanted some rest. Having my parents over for the first week was invaluable. My mother cooked, cleaned, and washed, while my father helped get the garden into shape. I still have some help - a postnatal doula is coming in two days a week for three hours at a time, and she cooks, helps with laundry, advises on breastfeeding and baby care issues, and this week will also help with cleaning the flat.
I'm recovering very well. We ventured out for our first short walk when Ruth was 1.5 weeks, and made our first trip to Starbucks when she was nearly two weeks. When venturing out, I need to wait until she's fed and settled, but once out, we're fine. Which brings me to the two things that have made a huge difference to me, babywearing and breastfeeding.
Yes, I'm pleased to report that breastfeeding is well established. I've been lucky in that baby is a good feeder, I had great support in hospital during the evening and night of her third day outside the womb, and I have enough milk to feed her. Even though only I feed her at the moment, the actual feeds are very little hassle. I just whip out the good stuff and off we go - unless she decides to fuss, study the wall behind me, go look for my nipple below my breast, pummel my breasts into shape with her hands, suck her hand/thumb, or wave her hands in front of her mouth while she extends her head, leaving my nipple exposed to the air. Patience and a firm hand on the back of her head can usually persuade her to see the light, though. No sterilising, no bottles, no bottle racks, no bottle warmers. When we're out and about, a small backpack with wipes, nappy sacks, nappies, and a spare outfit is more than enough for her needs. The only downside (?) is that I need to (and do) eat like a horse.
Babywearing means that quite a lot of the time, I carry baby around with me in a ring sling , sometimes also in a wrap carrier. The ring sling is great for nursing: you shift baby down and/or to your side, get the food on the table, and off you go. If you're nursing in public, you can drape a discreet sling over both of you. The sling not only helps a fussy sleepy baby transition from howling to sleep - it's also invaluable if you walk or use public transport a lot, like me, who can't even drive. On busses, you only take up one seat, you can navigate every shop without problems, and around the house, baby's safe and sound asleep while mum does some light housework like sweeping the floor, or folding laundry. A real life saver.
Right now, I'm using the ring sling a lot more than the Didymos, because putting it on is very quick and easy, and nursing in it is really easy, too, while I prefer to leave the big wrap carrier for longer trips, because it distributes baby's weight more evenly across my back. Slings have some disadvantages, too, though. You can't cook in them (too dangerous for baby), you need to ensure that airflow is not obstructed, you need to make sure that baby can't fall out (especially with the ring sling) and that her head is well-supported.
In fact, that sling has been so crucial to me that I was floored when a midwife suggested I shouldn't use it, because a baby had suffocated in a sling, which left me in tatters. I researched this issue like a woman possessed, and found out that
a) the midwife didn't know very much about slings, so the recommendations she gave me were sort of useless; she didn't really seem to know the details of the case, such as the make and model of that sling, anyway
b) I did need to adjust the way I used my ring sling for a newborn, which I have duly done
c) the only case of a baby suffocating in a baby carrier that I came across was in a Tomy carrier, a vertical carrier very different from a ring sling, and that was because mum had wrapped her child up way too snugly and tightly
My health visitor, who advises new mums on baby care, hadn't heard of any such warnings, either, and the midwives and doctors in hospital, where I twice wore baby in the sling, never batted an eyelid. (I don't have a pediatrician I could ask - in the UK, babies and children are cared for by General Practitioners).
So, the conclusion is: do your own research. That I was prepared for, but what floored me was how vulnerable to this not-quite-correct advice I was, especially because it was given in a bad manner. Probably to do with the hormones of a woman two weeks post partum ...
Finally, thank you SO MUCH to
pinkfluffyllama, actionreplay and jessanndi for the lovely cards, hildigunnur for the card and sweet gift, and piperx for the fantastic card & pressies. I think that the toy will come into its own shortly :). pinkfluffyllama, we're already using your box for storing cotton wool!
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2005-08-30 01:04 pm (UTC)Great news on the breastfeeding! Glad to hear it's going so well. Don't forget about that 6 week growth spurt though... be prepared for some rough days, and you'll do just fine. The doula should be a big help about that too.
no subject
Date: 2005-09-03 10:04 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-30 01:06 pm (UTC)If babies suffocated in slings they wouldn't be as popular as they are. I envy you, twing slings exist but are uncomfortable and far too heavy, I loved carrying one baby close to me when dad had the other, but we rarely got out that way.
no subject
Date: 2005-09-03 09:28 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-09-03 09:53 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-09-03 10:03 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-30 01:08 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-30 01:16 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-30 01:30 pm (UTC)I'm so happy to hear that things are going so well. Ruth certainly has some great parents. :)
no subject
Date: 2005-08-30 03:06 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-30 03:32 pm (UTC)Much love, Jen
no subject
Date: 2005-09-03 10:34 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-30 03:56 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-30 04:16 pm (UTC)There's so many thoeries out there, you were wise to do a little research before taking what the midwife said to heart. Baby suppliers are very careful with their products, and if there was any danger it would have come with warnings. There's also legislation that keeps baby products safe, so if it was sold to you new, from a store, it passed inspection.
Have fun!
no subject
Date: 2005-09-03 10:35 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-30 04:50 pm (UTC)And telling brand new mothers scary nthings like that when you don't know what you're talking about is gah. Honestly.
no subject
Date: 2005-09-03 10:40 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-30 04:57 pm (UTC)Despite the challenges, I loved breastfeeding too. It has to be one of the greatest inventions ever. It's the best stuff on earth.
I'm glad you still have at least a little bit of help. (Your post reminds me that I need to find a doula asap. Something I promised myself that I would do next time.)
And of course, I bought a Maya wrap too. It's even a similar color and pattern as yours. :) I started using it too late though and Amelia decided that she didn't like it. So for the next one, I'm going to use it right away so the baby is used to it. I was really impressed with the Maya Wrap company. They really seem to know what they're doing. Usually when there is a problem associated with a well-known baby product, it's due to some other circumstance, such as not using it properly. I would guess there were other factors involved in the death of that other baby.
Glad to hear from you!
no subject
Date: 2005-09-03 10:39 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-30 05:10 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-30 06:07 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-30 06:37 pm (UTC)Take lots of video and pictures... and ENJOY!
no subject
Date: 2005-09-03 10:36 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-30 08:21 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-30 08:39 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-09-03 10:37 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-31 01:51 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-31 08:32 pm (UTC)*hugs*
no subject
Date: 2005-09-03 10:38 am (UTC)