percival

This comes from the Guardian Shortcuts, October 7:

Shall I compare thee to a lump in bed?

When the first lady Laura Bush returned home last week from a tour of Europe - which included a highly visible encounter with the French president Jacques Chirac - she found a poem penned by her husband on their bed. On Friday, she read it out in Washington as she opened the national book festival in America. This is how it went:

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Oh my, lump in the bed
How I've missed you

Roses are redder Bluer am I
Seeing you kissed by that charming French guy

The dogs and the cat, they missed you too
Barney's still mad you dropped him - he ate your shoe.
The distance, my dear, has been such a barrier
Next time you want an adventure, just land on a carrier.
George W Bush