an addendum ...

[percival]

First of all, I should maybe say again that I love and respect angelofthenorth for being a survivor, for taking a stance, and for standing her ground.

This is her reply to my "nervous breakdown" entry, in which she defends her position very well. (Yes, Angel, much of that entry was bollocks, but then I was sobbing when I wrote it. I should probably not post in such an emotional mood again!)

It is indeed sad to see kids "written off" because they are too old to be adopted, and it must be doubly sad for somebody like her, who's been actively involved in caring for those kids, to see somebody who might be a potential fosterer cry off.

Comments

[awelkin.livejournal.com]

There is always someone else's opinion, and truthfully my decision to not have children does have something to do with overpopulation and world resources as well.

However, this is a very personal decision, and I've never felt that I could or should influence anyone's stance at all. Your views are okay with me.

I do think that if you want to enrich your life with a child, even if you can't have your own, you might consider this option. You would be a great foster mom. If I ever wake up one morning wanting children, adoption is the route I intend to take.

But I know it's important to you to have your own. Keep trying, and we'll keep praying.

Catherine

[perceval.livejournal.com]

It's not really the desire to have my own - although that would be great. It's rather the fear of what would happen, were I to be entrusted with the care of a child with severe behavioural problems. Also, echoing what angua9 said in response to the nervous breakdown entry, I may well not be able to let go of the kids again, once I've started caring for them.

[dandelionsummer.livejournal.com]

Letting go would be the crippling thing as far as fostering would go for me, but it would be a case of just coping with whatever's thrown at you. Even when things are at their worst, there's always the really good times that makes it worth the pain. Trite, but exceptionally true.

Thing is, you can make a difference to someone's life, whether it's a kid of your own, or one you're fostering or adopting. You do the best you can with whatever hand is dealt to you, and no one can ask any more of you than that. No kid is 'perfect' (LOL my trio aren't anyway!) but then no parent is either. Don't set yourself too high of a standard as far as parenthood goes - the wheel invariably comes off at some point! - you'd do a good job because you care. That alone makes the world of difference.

(((hugs)))

[zanzara.livejournal.com]

I would hate to see you refrain from posting when you are upset emotionally. Lord knows that's most often when I feel like posting, and probably need to.

As some of us have said, this forum is not an academic setting and we shouldn't have to feel so restricted about what we say in it.

Hopefully readers can keep that in mind, and read all entries with some degree of insight regarding the necessary "emotionality" of posting...getting away from that "who's right - who's wrong" business.

[angelofthenorth.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

Been trying to 'see' you online, but not managed to. Don't stop posting when emotional, it's a good place to be. I'm not always quite so ruthless as that, but sometimes I am, because I've found that pussy-footing around an issue doesn't help.

I hope it all works out. I may not have caused the problem, but I was certainly a trigger.

Sorry.

[calanthe-b.livejournal.com]

I hate not having my own internet connection, I always miss things...it sounds like you've had a rotten time of it over the past few days. I don't think I can say anything to help, but I'm sending you ~hugs~ anyway.